Congratulations, Virginia

When we moved to Virginia, there was a Republican governor. There were two Republican senators. Virginia voted overwhelmingly for Bush in 2000. It was as red as a state can get.

Tonight our governor is a Democrat, both our senators are Democrats, and we just sent our 13 electors to vote for Barack Obama. I'm proud of my state, proud of the work we did, proud to change my blog's tagline.

We no longer live in a red state. Barack Obama has done what many thought impossible. All the ugliness, all the smears, all the dirt that was slung at him -- it didn't work. He is going to be President anyway. Congratulations, America. You did the right thing.

One Last Bit of Motivation

It's Barack Obama, Charlie Brown! The Obama Infomercial

Brilliant, brilliant, brilliant.

I absolutely loved it. I don't mind telling you that I cried.

I had intended to try and watch this through the eyes of a skeptic, someone who has decided that Obama is the anti-christ, that he is Hitler, that he is a Muslim terrorist who plans to destroy the country. Through the eyes of someone who believes he is, in short, a liar. It was like trying to go back to the way I felt in the primary, when I wanted Hillary to be President so much. I looked at this commercial objectively and tried to really see where someone might say, "That doesn't make sense" or "That's a bad idea." I thought I would get some insight into the people I'm trying to understand.

I couldn't actually manage it. I was only able to maintain my fake disdain for a minute. Seeing him in that wood paneled office, looking so Presidential, was just such a relief. The idea of a smart, capable man in the White House, a sensible, thoughtful man at the helm filled me with energy and hope. The rest of the commercial brought it home. For me, there were no sour notes. He was direct, clear, and specific. No one could say they don't know what he plans to do. No would could say, now, that they don't know what he's thinking. The only response to that commercial that would make a person decide to vote against the man is "He's just lying."

The response, "He's lying" leads directly to "Well, McCain lies too," and from there it's a short step to "They're all liars" and then we get "What the hell" and finally "Does it really matter what I think anyway?" This conclusion is the antithesis of Obama's message. We are the change we need. He wants us to change the world, not him.

Unless, of course, he's lying. Which is, I suppose, a valid response. Maybe the smart person in me demands that I reserve some percentage of my confidence for saying "If he's not lying..." If he's not lying, he's a good man who wants to help. If he's not lying, he's a smart man with a clear plan. If he's not lying, I can depend on his values and his intentions, on his quick brains and his wise team, I can relax and stop worrying.

This time around, I have decided on purpose to suspend my disbelief. I decided it on the night of the acceptance speech. I remember it very well, it was like a bag of sand running out of my legs through my feet. I gave myself permission to just believe this person's words, without constantly qualifying, second-guessing, hedging, reminding myself of what shitbags those politicians always are, and how impossible it is for a man in Obama's position to actually live out his convictions and values. I just don't care about that right now, it seems like. Maybe it's because I am stupid and naive -- I have been accused of that. Or maybe it's because I have been down the road of "He's lying" all the way through "what the hell" and on the other side of "It doesn't matter" is "I might as well believe him."

So I just can't be objective. And I think that's alright.



I hope that some undecided voters watched tonight's infomercial (the above clip is one third of it, I think) with an open mind, and I hope that some of them were able to relax and say, "Okay, I'll let go of my suspicion and run with this guy." In some ways, it's more familiar and almost more comfortable to choose the route of fear and doubt and worry. Definitely cooler to say "Oh, the bastards, they all lie, there's no good choice!" Many times the brave choice also looks like the stupid choice, am I right? But I don't need any more doubt in my life. I don't need any more studied cool, any more scorn and cynical disdain. I do need energy, strength, faith, and relief.

I only have my one little vote. I'm going to give it to Obama. Not because he's the lesser of two evils, but because I truly believe he is the best man for the job. It isn't going to be a hesitant, fearful little vote. It's going to be a vote with confidence, a firm, bold vote. A vote I will not regret.

McCain Voters on Parade

Warning: Do not play this video if you have children present, unless they're mature enough to handle expressions of aggressive racism, death threats, and hate. I'm not sure how I would explain these people to my kids -- so they won't be watching this one.



Republicans want to label Obama as a terrorist because "You are who you associate with." I know all Republicans aren't racists, and I'm sure that you, reading this, feel grossed out too. However, as you call Obama a terrorist because he spent time with William Ayers, maybe you should look around yourself at that rally, on your blogroll, in your church, and think about who you are associating with in this campain. I know that I wouldn't want to associate with these people, at all. Wouldn't want to hold the same sign in my hand, wouldn't want to cheer for the same candidate, wouldn't want to attend the same rally. The most chilling moment: the man who says "When he gets in the White House..." and then makes a gun with his hand and simulates shooting. I also feel utter disgust for the sickening man in with the "Democrats for McCain" sign who says, "I could never vote for a black man."

Are you proud of these friends of yours, McCain supporters? Proud to add your voice to theirs in support of this candidate? You are who you associate with, right? Are you proud to stand elbow to elbow with these violent bigots? The people in this video are not from a radical group -- not the Klan, not some fringe group -- just a random stream of McCain supporters on their way to a rally in PA.

I would like to think that McCain would condemn all of this. Maybe if he had run as an independent, maybe if he had picked someone else as VP, maybe if he had stayed the man he was eight years ago, instead of bending in so many ways to get that nomination and that conservative support, then he could be proud of his campaign, proud of the votes he gets next week. But I would hope, seriously, that if he looked out of that bus and heard any of these reprehensible epithets -- the threats, the racism -- that his stomach would turn like mine does. How many people will be voting for McCain on Tuesday because they just can't vote for a black man?

Maybe you've got a sincere hope that those disgusting racist votes against a man because he's black will be enough, added to yours, to keep Obama from being President. I hope that they won't.

Barack Obama and Socialism

If you enjoy having weekends off, thank a socialist.
If you appreciate the eight-hour work day, thank a socialist.
If you approve of minimum wage, thank a socialist.

If you like living in a country where it's illegal to sell your child to a sweatshop for a dollar a week, you can be thankful that socialists, yes those are anti-capitalist, anti-free-market socialists, worked hard in the face of big business and government opposition to make that happen.

Do you like the fact that you don't have to step over sick homeless people on the way to your car? Do you feel thankful that hoards of starving orphans aren't begging you to carry your bag at the airport? Do you approve of the fact that elderly people don't have to die in the street if they run out of money?

Do you want to take a little trip to 19th century New York City and see what life was like before welfare, before labor laws, before publicly funded garbage disposal and street cleaning, before the government could tell you how to treat your children, before the government could tell you how to operate your factory safely, before the government could tell you how to wire and plumb your apartment building, before socialism?

I keep hearing, "I enjoy living in a capitalist country and I want to keep it that way! Don't you take my capitalism away from me!" Sister, you don't live in a capitalist country. Sorry. That has already been taken away from you. Along with children working in mines, tenements made out of cardboard, and unregulated air pollution. Do you miss all that? Is it just killing you that the terrible socialists with their wealth redistribution gave Medicaid to babies in poverty? After all, they didn't earn it. Their mothers couldn't afford it. In your sparkling, elegant capitalist society, they wouldn't have it. You want to be in charge of spending your own money, not giving it to the government to redistribute to the poor! Do you wish we could go back to a time when generous churches and noble private citizens were responsible for picking up the tab for those babies? Because you know what? They didn't. Read about it. It was ugly.

Do you drive on public roads? Are you glad that every child in the country has an opportunity to go to school? Do you like the fact that meat packers have to uphold certain standards in their factories to sell you a steak? You like paid vacation days? These are socialist principles, people. The USDA. The EPA. Where you see government regulating business for the benefit of the people, that's socialism. Where you see safety nets for poor people, old people, children, and sick people, that's socialism. You really want to get rid of all that?

The big businesses of this country did not suddenly one day wake up and say, "Hey, let's give those workers two days off a week. They've earned it!" They did not just announce, "You know, it's Tuesday, let's set a minimum wage!" They didn't establish a 9 to 5 work day just because 9 and 5 are good numbers for them. It goes against profit and the free market to be kind, safe, and fair, and yet those are the principles that I'm teaching my children to live by. Aren't you? Are you not teaching them to put profit first and step on whoever they have to step on to get there? Then guess what: you're not teaching them to be little capitalists. Sorry! But you're not.

I don't like to talk about religion on this blog, because for me religion is very private. But I will ask you this: What did Jesus say to Nicodemus? Did he say, "Gather up all your awesome money and all your possessions, put them in your SUV and follow me?" No, he told Nicodemus to give all his money away, then follow. Did Jesus say that heaven would be populated by fabulous capitalists who had grabbed their piece of the pie and hung on for dear life? No, he said it would be hard for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven. We're deifying Joe the Plumber, who wants to hang on to his wealth, who wants to get ahead, who wants to grab his piece of the dream. Am I reading the same Bible you are? The first shall be last, and the last shall be first. What does that mean for Joe?

The latest news to go shrieking around the internet is that Barack Obama was a member of the New Party in Chicago. Before you get all lathered up about it, read about the party on Wikipedia and on their own web site. Did the New Party espouse a whole lot of socialist principles, like affordable housing and a living wage? Yes. But you know what? So do I. I don't consider myself a socialist, but I sure wouldn't want to consider myself a capitalist either.

If you want to make your mind up about Barack Obama, read his policies, study his plan, and make your decision based on what he has said he values and what he has said he will do. Getting scared about the word "socialist" is irrational. Before you run screaming into the night, look around you. Socialism has done a lot of good in your world. Are you afraid that Obama the socialist is going to make your working day shorter? Are you afraid he's going to make your food safer, give you more city parks, make your air cleaner, make your workplace safer, give more people voting rights, establish more vacation days, or something awful like that? Are you afraid he's going to keep us out of foreign wars, stop writing huge checks to big businesses, and improve our schools? Wow, yeah, that's terrifying.

I can't get excited about this socialism scare. For me, those are all good things.

Be kind. Be fair. Help people. Protect the weak.

Which of these excellent principles is capitalist again?

Question and Answer Time: The Emotional Democrat Edition

Question from Chris:

Now just out of curiousity since I am neither a Democrat nor Republican, why are Democrats (you sure seem to identify with that party) so emotional? I think that when we, as people, stick to facts and leave out the emotion more will be accomplished. I think that is why Republicans own talk radio. BTW - I rarely listen to their talk-shows but when I hear them I have to laugh when I hear Democrats getting emotional. It may work for now when the chips are down but if Obama doesn't fix the mess both he and the Democrats will be on the way out as the cynical American people slam the door.

My answer:

I'm not sure what to make of your comment, Chris. I wouldn't generalize that either Republicans or Democrats are more "emotional," nor would I agree that Republicans have mastered sticking to the facts.

It has concerned me that our current President has professed to be motivated largely by his religious beliefs and what he feels God is leading him to do, internationally. That doesn't strike me as sticking to the facts, nor does it seem like a better plan than "getting emotional." Wasn't it Bush Sr. who invented "compassionate conservatism"? Is this fact-based compassion or is emotion okay when displayed by Republicans?

If you're judging all Democrats based on the ones who call in or get put on the air during conservative talk shows, I think you might examine what motivation Hannity or Rush would have in screening for hysterical nonsensical Democrats. :) They aren't exactly looking for articulate and intelligent examples of the opposition. I'd guess they're looking for exactly the opposite. I've been accused of being naive in this thread, but I'd say it would be pretty naive to believe that the Democrats that Hannity chooses to show you are truly representative.

Your last sentence confuses me. After eight years of a Republican administration, you say the chips are down and we're in a mess. You demand that Obama fix it or else? That seems strange to me. I want Obama to make intelligent, moral choices. I want him to stick to the Constitution. I want him to be responsible with money and with the lives of our troops.

If the "cynical American people" are standing around with their thumbs in their belt loops waiting for him to fix everything, they're really not putting "country first" -- they're just hoping to be right. For years Democrats have been accused of wanting America to fail in this or that way so that they can score political points. Your comment exhibit exactly that attitude, one I expect we'll be seeing a lot of from Republicans if Obama wins.

Derision, scorn, criticism -- all of those things that have been unpatriotic for 8 years. Imagine! :)

Vice Presidential Debate Recap: Sarah Palin vs. Her Old Maid Aunt

Palin: Hiyas! I'm a soccer mom! I'm a mom and a hockey mom! You may find me showing up at a soccer game near you, this Saturday. I'll be asking you if you're more afraid of me or of the economy. We'll put the partisanship and special interests aside, and do some lemonade shots, Maverick-style! I respect all those years that other people have spent in Washington and the US Senate, but I think America is looking for something new and fresh, some new energy and fresh ideas. That's why I'm running with John McCain, who is younger and fresher than you could possibly imagine. Drill, baby, drill!



But you asked me about the bailout bill. Darn right I blame the predator lenders! There was deception and corruption there, there sure was! But we need to make a commitment here, all you Joe Sixpacks and Hockey Moms across the nation, that we are never going to live outside of our means again, and we will take responsibility for our own actions. So, it's their fault, by golly, and we need to take responsibility. Hey, I'm just a reg'lar girl from down the street, ya know? I don't like those east coast politicians keepin' the energy producing states from producin' it! I take issue with this redistribution of wealth theory that you people espouse. We've got to stop helping out those greedy Wall Street types and help people that still sit at kitchen tables. But not by redistributing wealth -- no! You believe that paying taxes is patriotic. I'm part of the middle class, and I believe that government is part of the problem! I'm on my way to Washington, darnit, to become part of the government! I mean part of the solution! As mayor of Alaska, up there, I took away the tax breaks to those greedy oil companies. And now the greed of greed has got to be stopped with Mavericks! We have got to clean up this planet! How are we gonna get there to positively impact the effects of this! Newk-yoo-ler! I have a lot of gay friends but I define marriage as between one man and one woman and I'm being as straight up with Americans as I can. Plus, I'm a mom. Now listen. I may not answer the questions the way that you or the moderator want to hear, but I'm going to talk straight to the American people. Now I want to tell you about when I was mayor--

Ifill: I'm sorry, Governor, but we're out of time on that question.



Joe Biden: Yaarrrrrrrr! These are the facts. Blabbity blabbity.

Predicted montages:
1. Joe Biden repeatedly calling John McCain a good man and even saying, "I love him."
2. Sarah Palin saying "Darn right!"
3. Sarah Palin talking about greedy people and how greedy they are.
4. Sarah Palin claiming to be middle class.
5. Sarah Palin mispronouncing the word "nuclear" so many times that it's almost Limbaughian.

I actually think the Governor did pretty well. Given that the expectations were so low she would have "succeeded" by managing not to get out there and drool on her collar, I think she succeeded. She was smug, derisive, she read scripted answers to questions that weren't asked, and she winked at the camera more than once. In short, she was like Bush in drag. My least favorite moment from her was when she told us she was chosen for VP because she's a mom. That was particularly low. I wouldn't be surprised if McCain gets a bump from her grinning and nose-crinkling and goshdurn spunk. Biden did fine. He came off as firm, on message, and fatherly. He had some good lines but mostly he just sounded solid, rational, and informed. She came off as real super fiery and totally like energized for the big game. It was a good performance. Good for Biden too, because if she had fallen right on her face it would have been hard for him to come out looking like the good guy. As it was, no one will remember much that he said, but hopefully they'll remember her grinning and rolling her eyes after he talked about his dead child and wife, deriding him and his "ticket" for looking back at the past instead of ahead to the future. Classy lady, that Palin. Warm as ice.

Edited to add: Another awful moment I was reminded of by a commenter on my DKos diary: When Palin acknowledged that Biden's current wife is a school teacher and said, "Her reward will be in heaven." So, his first wife died and his second one will get her reward in heaven, as promised by Sarah Palin. Wow. I bet he feels a lot better now.

"Aren't You Worried About What Will Happen to White People?"

Today we went canvassing in the morning. I left the children at home playing video games with Dan and took Ahno out with me. After picking up our canvassing packets at the launch, we found our target neighborhood, a middle class area with big trees, oldish houses, and some waterfront lots. The residents were a mix of black and white and Asian, old and young. Some had taken great care with their yards and homes and some had kind of let nature take its course. It was a very interesting place to knock on doors. Wonderful and also horrifying.

Of course we met some McCain supporters, but we met some Obama supporters too. We met a gay couple, newly moved to the neighborhood, enthusiastic Democrats. We met a small business owner who thanked us warmly for being out for Obama, and asked us for bumper stickers for his truck. Some wanted yard signs, some just offered to talk to their friends and neighbors about the campaign, be brave and show their support for their candidate. Most of the McCain supporters were polite to us, and we talked up Mark Warner, who everyone loves, and then asked them to just consider voting for Obama. They chuckled and agreed to think about it.

Then there was this one old guy. My sheet said he was eighty-six years old. He lived in a nice house, in this pleasant area, and answered the door politely. I asked him who he was considering voting for in the presidential race and he said he was leaning toward McCain. As I asked him more questions, I discovered that he was a lifelong Democrat, and planning to vote Democrat the rest of the way down the ballot.

So why was he not going to vote for Obama?



He said: "Well, I don't know about that one. Aren't you worried about what will happen to white people, once *they* get in power?"

My jaw dropped. I had only a second to think of a response.

I said: "I'm not worried at all, sir. I think Barack Obama is a wonderful person and I think he will do what's best for this country and for the whole world. I hope you'll consider voting for him too."

I think at that point I might have mumbled something about having a nice day and I stumbled off down the sidewalk. A real, live, bonafide racist. Yes, he had a lunch stain on his shirt and a few missing teeth, but he was mostly normal looking. He had no slavering fangs, no black shiny horns. He was wearing house slippers -- no cloven hooves. His yard was mowed. His car was clean. But he had looked at me conspiratorially and asked me if I was *WORRIED* about what would *HAPPEN* to *WHITE PEOPLE*!

Unbelievable.



I'm sure there are people out there canvassing in other places where they're running into this kind of thing all the time. But it felt, to me, as if there was a little pocket of rot in this nice little neighborhood. A pocket of rot right next to a house where a black couple offered us to come into their house and have a drink of water, a pocket of rot next to that small business owner, or the WWII veteran who told us he would consider Obama... a nasty little pocket of dreck in house slippers and wire glasses, looking at me *as if it were a perfectly legitimate question* and asking me if I wasn't worried, as a white person, about what would happen to me if "THEY" got into power.

I wish I had said, "Well, let me ask you: What are you worried about specifically? Are you worried you'll have to go live in a shack behind the house you currently own? Are you worried you won't be allowed to vote? Drive? Go to college? Are you fearful that you'll have to pay more for soup at the grocery store or that you'll have to sit at the back of the bus? I mean what exactly has you concerned?"

Probably that wouldn't have been good either. We're not supposed to get into fights with people. Plus, he was like a million years old. But, what would you have said? How do you respond to something like that? Here is a *lifelong Democrat* who has written off Barack Obama as a candidate because he is afraid of black people. Do old people get a pass on racist remarks? What argument can I offer, standing on the porch of this person, to counter eight decades of opinion? What do you say?

Night One with the Democrats: DNC 2008

I want to vote for Obama. I do. I am hoping that during the course of this convention, I can make that choice. Last night didn't do it for me though. It didn't work.



First, I was annoyed by the "American Voices" idea. Interspersed with the "real" speakers, there are lots of little nobodies who get to stand up there at the podium and say, "It is so unlikely that I would be here! I am so honored because I am just a county organizer!" Honey, there's a reason you're shocked to be up there. It's because you're not a good speaker, you have nothing interesting to say, and your story about how Barack Obama changed your life with his magical magic is nothing new or interesting.

Everyday Americans do not entertain or engage me, unless they are being made to eat llama guts or sing Stevie Wonder songs. Media, take note. I watch the political conventions to see roof-raising speeches delivered by politicians who are analogizing for their lives. If I wanted to hear average Americans tearfully testifying about Obama, I'd stop hanging up on those volunteers who keep calling my house. Political conventions are for rip-roaring, for spit-flicking, for fist-pumping.



Which brings us to Michelle Obama. Total, abject failure of a speech, in my opinion. You know when the pundits are calling your speech "well-delivered" and congratulating you on doing what you "needed" to do, you're in trouble. To me, the words she was saying were okay if a bit generic. However, the delivery was all high school public speaking coach. Too studied, too robotic. At no time did she look like she was speaking from the heart. She was performing. Now, hey, I don't blame her for practicing, for studying, etc. But she needed to show us something real, something moving, a little raw, a little spontaneous. There was nothing like that. It happened as it was supposed to happen, and there were no moments.

Wait, I am wrong. There were moments -- awkward, desperate, superfake moments during the live teleconference between Barack Obama, in someone's home in Kansas, and Michelle Obama, on stage with their two daughters. Today the media is calling it Huxtable-like. I found it completely horrifying. It was too scripted and not scripted enough. There was a difficult delay in hearing what they were saying to each other. The younger daughter, when Obama asked her, "How do you think Mom did?" replied, "She did good." I like kids as much as anyone else, and maybe it's for that reason that I kind of resent them being framed and delivered like that. There was nothing natural about the little girl asking, in Shirley Temple tones, "What state are you in, Daddy?" to lead him to his introduction of the family that was hosting him. There was nothing cute about the older child's mike getting cut off and her looking around nervously, unsure. The whole thing stank. By all means, bring them up on stage, let us ooo and awww and "How cute!" It's great that Obama has school-age children, and an awesome wife. But having them put on some kind of Neo-Rockwellian tableau was insulting to us and to them. Double plus ungood.

So, was there anything good about the evening? YES.

Benny donned his convention hat and eagerly watched the early parts of the program. We all shouted "McCain Was Wrong!" along with Obama's sister, and noted her use of the rhetorical device -- saying a repeated phrase that the audience can use to participate. Benny noticed and pointed out a *lot* of vocabulary words that he knew from our studies. We noted the "a man who" speech that Caroline Kennedy delivered about Teddy Kennedy. We noted the different "a man who" approach in the video that preceded Michelle Obama's speech. He hooted and cheered and jumped around. That made me feel happy. I think he is enjoying this, and will continue to enjoy the conventions this week and next week. It does my little political heart proud.

Instead of moving on to the next part of the class, since the conventions are only beginning, I think we will spend another week on political conventions. I'm going to be posting some additional activities after the Democrats are done and before the Republicans get rolling, and then we'll segue into producing our campaign materials next week.

Vote For Me! An Elections Unit Study for Young Candidates

On August 6, 2008, I began be e-teaching a class on elections via this blog. The class took each student through developing their own presidential candidacy, including creating a campaign commercial, developing a platform, and interviewing constituents. By working on our own campaigns, we learned social studies, history, math, science, music and art lessons. Here on this site each week, there were printables to download, songs, lesson plans, project ideas, bias-free encouragement, and a guideline for taking students through this experience.

The class was designed to be tailored by you to meet your child at his or her level, so the materials are flexible and can be used for a variety of ages. If you liked my Treasure Island seminar, you'll love this class. We will sing the presidents, deconstruct slogans, study the effects of political rhetoric on heart rates of the speaker, and more! The class will culminate on Election Day, with one more lesson during January showcasing the inauguration. Here's a list of what's in store, with links to classes I have already posted:

Prelude: Election Overview
What is voting and who is the president?
Why vote? Why not just agree?
Majority and Minority: How we decide
States and the Electoral College
Voting Rights

Class #1. Let’s Get This Party Started
Democrats, Republicans, Libertarians
Inventing a political party
Defining Issues
Picking a mascot
Picking a name
Posters: Strongly agree, agree, disagree, strongly disagree.

Class #2. Unconventional Conventions
The “a man who” speech
Physical effects of listening to political rhetoric
Choosing a running mate
Duct Tape Convention Hats
Balancing the Ticket
Interpeting Promotional Media

Class #3. The Platform and the Stump
Prioritizing issues to write a platform
Campaign Promises
Creating a stump speech in 5 paragraphs
Pause for applause: Delivering the stump speech
Planning a campaign trip – map

Class #4. A Poster You Can Believe In
Choosing an Image
Icons and Imagery
Where can you put your poster?
Slogans Past and Present
How Much Can You Remember?

Class #5. Commercial Break
Choosing music, background, clothing
Types of ads: Negative, Warm/Fuzzy, Scare, Humor
Famous political ads through history of TV
Spin Worksheet
HTML Template for Campaign Site

This project is free and open to all students interested in current events. If you do use the materials, I would love to hear about it and see pictures!

Other People's Candidates are like Other People's Boyfriends

Edited to add the following context: I originally wrote this as a diary on the community blog for democrats called DailyKos. On that site, there is an epidemic of candidate-bashing, so violent that lately if you say anything pro-Hillary, you get a railroad spike in the eye. This blog/diary was in response to that problem. So, it's only meant to address and enlighten fellow treehugging librulls, not friends who are republicans or independents! If you are a republican or independent, you are welcome and encouraged to bash Hillary to me all day! :) :) Because you don't have to vote for her if she ends up the nominee, obviously. You can vote for your guy. As long as it's not Mitt Romney.

Who hasn't been in this situation? Your friend is dating a guy you find repulsive. You think he's politically backward, or he has a career you don't respect, or maybe you even caught him ogling a waitress while your friend was in the bathroom. Or... your friend supports a candidate you despise. You think he's a weak golfer, or she's a closet cannibal, or he's soft on redwoods, or she's got cankles. What do you do?

I'll tell you what you don't do, if you're smart. You don't march up to your friend and tell her, "Your boyfriend is a lying cheating ugly racist whoremongering bastard and marrying him will ruin your life."

Why? Three reasons:

1. That friend's boyfriend may become that friend's husband. Now you become the enemy. You're now the jerk that talked mean about her man, and it's them against the world, and you were (obviously) so wrong about him and how can she ever trust your opinion on anything again? True, they may be doomed. He may truly be a jerk. He may ruin her life and she may ditch him in six months. But saying "I told you so" isn't going to go far to heal your relationship with her.

That friend's candidate might become your party's nominee. What then? You either have to now eat everything you said and vote for this guy/gal, or you have to stick nobly to your opinion, and write in your mother. Whatever you do about the voting, consider where you now stand with your friend. Is she gloating? Are you bitter? Is this helping?

2. You cannot change your friend's mind by getting nasty. If you feel you must state the facts, to protect her from certain disaster, then quietly state the facts. But remember: she is in love. Love is blind. Candidate-love can be like this too. Lashing out against the candidate will most likely only make her love him/her more.

People might be convinced to switch teams by facts, by records, by ideas, by well-reasoned arguments. No one sane is going to switch teams because of name-calling and crabbiness.

3. You respect your friend. Your friend loves him, and you don't. But you love your friend! And you think she's pretty smart! You haven't known your friend to eat shards of glass, or sleep on railroad tracks, or watch "Making the Band" or anything else self-destructive and idiotic, so... maybe there's something there that you don't see. You could be wrong. If you truly respect your friend, or your fellow dem, you have to accept that their support for candidate X might not be motivated out of malice or lunacy, but out of reasonable belief in that person's ability to govern.

It's hard to have cocktails and sushi with someone whose boyfriend you've described as the devil incarnate. And when it comes to this election, the party has yet to begin. I want to be able to sit at any table, without worrying about who heard me talking smack in the bathroom.

Kerry's Endorsement: Kiss of Death

John Kerry, that undead mastadon, most famous for losing a no-brainer election against the actual devil as he stood there in horns and red cape, promising to engulf the world in flames , endorsed Barack Obama this week. I knew it would be the kiss of death for his campaign. I did not know, however, that they were going to literally try and make out.

I have to report something, but first I have to confess something. So, the confession: Instead of allowing the children's minds to be enriched by listening to their Suzuki CDs, I've been listening to conservative talk radio lately. Call it election fever. I hope it goes away, but it's not like Barack Obama hope, it's like maybe-this-Ding-Dong-is-a-magic-one-with-no-calories hope. Now the report: Sean Hannity said something today that was so powerfully ironic, my ears almost bled:

Hannity was bemoaning the fact that the that irritating media (OF WHICH HE IS PART, RIGHT?!) has decided that the fight for the Republican nomination is between McCain and Huckabee, discounting Giuliani and Thompson's hopes for a comeback.

Hannity: I gotta tell ya. I am so tired of all the pundits and the talking heads telling us who to vote for! That is for us to decide!!

A Friendly Wager on the New Hampshire Primary

Dan asked if I wanted to place a bet on tonight's primary in New Hampshire. That is to say, he was ready to bet against Hillary -- was I ready to bet for her? So here is the bet:

Dan has a t-shirt that he has never worn. In 2006, Dan participated in the Tour of Hope ride, Lance Armstrong's cycling fundraiser for cancer research. Well, he tried to participate -- the event got cancelled due to hideous rain, but he did get the jersey, the shorts, and more importantly the t-shirt. The jersey and shorts are a nice victorious yellow, and he wears them a lot, but the t-shirt he has never worn. Mostly because it is a bright, hot, optimistic blue. It is also adorned with a giant yellow sunflower. Despite his firm support of Lance Armstrong and everything he represents, Dan would never want to wear that t-shirt. Neither would I, if it comes to that. I don't wear shirts with things on them.

So the wager is this: If Obama wins, I have to wear the shirt. If Hillary wins, Dan has to wear it.

This isn't a picture of the actual shirt, in fact this is one from 2005 and the West Coast version and it has been made into a quilt but this is the general idea:

Tune in tomorrow to see who had to spend the day in this lovely garment.

I Support Hillary Clinton

I support Hillary Clinton for President. I think she would be great at the job. I have quietly supported Hillary since I knew she was running, but didn't say much about it because I suspected that the only reason I wanted to cast a vote for her was because she was female. Now I think I know why I want her to win.

Hillary Clinton wants to be president not because she's a woman, or because she's entitled, or because she's power-hungry, but because she knows she can do it better than anyone else. You can see it in her face, in her frustration over the last week. She can't seem to understand why people don't believe her, don't trust her, don't want her. I understand though.

Barack Obama is slick and smooth, and Hillary is abrasive and tough. He is talking about hope and change and light and liberty. She is talking about experience, competence, knowledge, and work. Of course, he gets a lot of applause. People want to yell for hope and change, even if there is no substance behind the words, no specifics to support the glossy rhetoric.

No one is jumping out of their seat for competence. No one is waving a flag for hard work. But I want her in that office because she will be competent and work hard. That is what I need her to do. I do not need her to orate or inspire me. I need her to fix the country, and I think she will.

If she would have, from the beginning, talked like I've seen her talk this week, with tears in her eyes, about how she will be a good president, instead of saying "change" 53 times a minute and relying on Bill Clinton to shape her message, I think she'd be ahead right now. She is very compelling, when she breaks down and just speaks from the heart. I got this feeling, this week, that she feels responsible for the country, and that we should let her do what she needs to do.

Hillary Clinton may not win. She may be a rung on which future women step, to get to the top of that political ladder. Maybe it will be her daughter Chelsea someday, who makes it to the top. Maybe it will be my daughter. I am thankful, as a female and as an American, to this person who is enduring merciless criticism, hateful personal attacks, and all the jibes and jokes of a cruelly dismissive opposition. I don't think she'll look back on this time in her life as a fun romp through the USA, spreading smiles and listening to applause, like Obama probably will. She may look back on it as a screaming nightmare from start to finish. But I support her. I will vote for her in my stupid, irrelevant Virginia primary, whether she's still in the race or not. And I thank her for standing up under all of this, and smiling through her tears.

Iowa Caucus is Live on CSPAN and I am Liveblogging Here

If you aren't watching the CSPAN coverage of the Iowa caucus, you are really missing some entertainment. Shouting, voting by a show of hands, voting by hollering, fiddling with microphones, whispering, milling about, shouting, "HILLARY OVER HERE!", grumbling "We're moving!" and more hilarity. TURN IT ON! I will be adding to this post as the evening goes on. There's a channel for democrats and a channel for republicans.

8:19 A Richardson lady in a purple sweater is trying to woo away one of the Dodd people. She says, "I should have brought treats!"

8:21 Now the purple sweater is saying, "Your issue is capital punishment? Mine too. Mine too."

8:23 An Obama supporter is telling a redhead that Obama has as much experience as Abraham Lincoln had when he was elected. What he has is intelligence and the ability to build consensus. He doesn't pander. He always takes questions. The redhead is nodding and saying, "Okay." Reportedly, there is a great group of people in the Obama corner.

8:25 The Biden preference group is looking owly. He is not going to be viable. Someone supports a resolution that everyone gets to stay with their first choice. He wants to do away with the viability. He looks kind of like Steve Martin. I'm going to check with the republicans now.

8:28 The republicans in Carroll Iowa are milling around in the hallway.

8:29 A democrat is standing on a chair repeating the number 45. Cameras are pointing every which way. The new precinct chairperson reads a partial statement on affirmative action. Someone says, "45." Bill Richardson runs to the bathroom. The Biden people are holding their coats and growling at each other. They're down from 26 to 10.

8:31 A reasonable man with glasses explains about the benefits of resorting yourself to your second choice before or after the first vote. The Richardson folks are talking fast to everyone who's not in a viable group -- apparently they are close to viability and just need to hornswaggle a few more votes. (Hornswaggle is Iowan for persuade).

I wonder if some of these people knew they were going to be on CSPAN. Like, did they choose their clothes for it? Or?

That purple lady is still working hard for Bill R. Her argument now is that America doesn't elect Senators, so Edwards and Obama and Clinton are out. She kind of looks like Bill Richardson.

I am shallow.

8:36 Dodd, Kucinich, Biden, and Richardson people are told to realign. They need 57 per group to be a viable group. They are given 15 more minutes.

Benny and Sadie are in the tub. They have astronauts and Barbies and little action figures from The Nightmare Before Christmas. They're having a wonderful time.

8:38 The Richardson people now have 47! VIVA LA REVOLUTION! They are neglecting to count the evangelists that are out among the room, bringing in more victims.

8:39 Steve Martin asks us to consider the face we will present to the world, after our debacle in Iraq. To him, it is Barack. A blonde lady says, "But Edwards hasn't taken any public funding!" Steve Martin asks what Edwards' position is on public health. The campaign has never got back to him on that. Someone reasonable suggests that what's left of the Dodds and what's left of the Bidens go over and join the Richardsons. That makes sense. Do it, reasonable man. We are counting on you.

Benny just launched a rocket into the Barbie pool and caused all kinds of anguish. I am liveblogging from my bedroom.

8:45 Someone get audio on that guy in the bow tie!!! I need to know what he's saying!!!

Voting by a show of hands, counting people by raised hands, counting people by standing on a chair, voting by saying "aye!" -- all of these are very inexact sciences. But awesome. I mean, this is crazy. Now they are going to try sending everyone into the hall and count the on the way back in.

8:45 Edwards has over 100. He needs 56 to be viable in this precinct.

8:49 Applause. Richardson must have squatted, strained, and birthed a few voters in the corner.

But what are the republicans doing??? Someone in a sweater vest is saying that the surge worked. He sounds nervous and angry. It is better in the democrat room at the moment, but I am looking forward to Ron Paul-related antics. Oh, how I wish I lived in Iowa! Just for tonight.

8:51 All of the preference groups are trying to count themselves. None of them can figure out a really good way. A boom mike is hovering eagerly over the Obama group. There are a lot of wild Iowans supporting Obama tonight. So far, I am not kidding, NO ONE has showed the Hillary camp. I don't even know if she's viable in this precinct.

8:57 At a folding table, democrats are doing math.

186 Obama

116 Edwards

74 Clinton

That's it.

8:58 In the Republican room, there's a Mitt Romney sign hanging over a sign that says, "No smoking. No food. No drink." A white-haired man is walking around waving a yellow envelope. Wait, there's another one. There's a lot of joviality. Are they done? Someone has given the white-haired man another envelope to wave. Everyone is being sent back out into the hallway, or they are being drawn there by their instinct. Are they leaving? Did Ron Paul win? They're outside. They're walking through the snow. A lady in dangly earrings is pillaging a Fred08 sign. The caucus is over. The envelopes have left the building.

9:02 There are official vote-counter pens! I totally like want one! I have Iowenvy bad. Okay, so, it was just the voters who left, and now the envelopes have been delivered into a special room where they will now be counted according to a special republican system. Woo! Wee! Little pieces of white paper are flying around like swarms of moths! Iowans are hunching over them, making tongue-munching sounds.

9:04 It looks like the republicans voted by writing down the name of their candidates on little pieces of white paper that might have been provided by a drug company. They look like those promotional paper pads that you get if you go to a trade show or if you work as a dentist or something.

9:05 Papers are falling off the table, okay?

9:06 They're separating them into ones, twos, threes, and fours. Is that code for Ron Paul? Doesn't it seem weird that someone with a RUDY sticker on her shirt is counting votes? They write the totals on notebook paper! This is so weird!!! Forget technology -- these people don't even utilize electricity. I love CSPAN. People who wear sweaters without t-shirts underneath are in charge of this election, and they're counting on their fingers.

I am shallow! I reported that already!

I have to get the children out of the tub and put them to bed. The networks are reporting that Huckabee will win the republican caucus, and they have Obama, Edwards, and Clinton in a statistical dead heat on the democrat side. I love elections.